If I Only Had a Dollar For Every Time I Heard...


There are many 'common', albeit ridiculous things that we hear over and over in Property Management. We asked our Facebook audience to share their favourites with you for your entertainment. Some will make you laugh and others will make you cringe. Enjoy.

Tenant: 'We have no hot water.'

PM: 'Have you checked the pilot light is lit?'
Tenant: 'Ummm, what's the pilot light?'
~Kelly-Jade Kules

My card (bank account) was hacked. I'll pay rent when they send me the new card because they had to close my account.
~Linda Gulabovska

The property has been advertised for one week; the rent's far too high because the owner refuses to lower it.
"So what's the plan? Why isn't it renting? Can you take off the letting fee?"
~Krystal McDonald

Do we have to set up all the utilities? I thought you did all that?
~Samantha-anne Surgenor

I know it is 5pm Friday, but I've had no hot water since Monday.
~Matthew Devisser

End of tenancy; "Can I get my week in advance back?"
~Matthew Curtis

When tenants are applying; "I love cleaning. My friends say I'm a bit OCD"
First inspection; "Sorry for the mess, the kids have been on holidays from school"
2nd inspection; "oh, I've been sick for a few days"
~Jodie Keidge

Can we get the tenant to pay for that?
~Troy Summers

It's cleaner than when I moved in!
~Kim Moroni

No one answered so I didn't leave a message.
~Steve Pardon

Will you negotiate your commission? XYZ real estate is cheaper.
~Kasey Hudson

I can't pay rent this week can you just use my 2 weeks rent in advance.
~Lisa Smith

- My last agent loved me they were sad to see me go.
- You can't show people through until I have vacated.
- You cannot do routine inspections when I am not here.
- I work 8-5 Mon-Fri can I have an inspection after hours?
~Rachael Byrne

I want to make a complaint - your stupid property manager won't stop calling me about my rent. If this continues I will be contacting my solicitor as this is harassment!
~Kiara Farrell

It's not my *insert animal type here* - my friend has gone on holidays and I'm just pet sitting.
I don't care if I have bad rental history, I'll find a place on Gumtree.
~Jacinta Dangerfield

Every inspection scheduled without fail the same tenant phones with severely put on sick voice 'I have the flu and don't want to give it to you, can we reschedule for next week or the week after?'
~Mel Napier

This house is unlivable. I need a plumber today (On Saturday) dripping tap in ensuite bathroom. Went out and tightened it and it stopped.
~Carina Tomlinson

Owner: Why should I fix the oven? It was working when they moved in; they must have broken it.
~Raelene Jolly Stojanovic

I can't afford to pay my rent because I just bought a house and I can't pay the rent and mortgage at the same time. Why can't the owner just let me go?
~Yvette Buchel

- No my boyfriend does not live here he is just staying over for a while please sign my Centrelink form for me to get full rent assistance.
- I am on holidays and the rent will get paid when I am back at work.
- My mother died last week (and last month) so I cannot pay the rent.
- The dog chewed my bank card and I’m waiting to get a new one.
- I lost my wallet.
~Kathee Flood

Tenant (or owner) "Sorry I yelled/got grumpy/abused you when you asked me to pay my overdue water invoice/rent/electricity. I was having a bad day."
~Aimee Elyse

I work 8-5, can the contractor come around after then or on the weekend?
~Joanne Curtis

It worked fine when I lived there!
~Merissa Broderick

Everything worked fine when you sold me the house 5 years ago. You’ve obviously sold me a lemon.
~Glenda Jones

It was like that when we moved in and yes it is on the Entry Condition Report.
~Amanda Kent

I'm gong on holidays for two weeks, so why should I have to pay rent if I'm not living there?
~Brigette Neil

I just got back from holiday yesterday so haven't had time to clean for the inspection.
~Emily Palamountain

Me: your direct debit reversed again. Tenant: there must be an issue with the bank!!!
~Rosemary Mcvilly

It was like that when I moved in. Actually it was worse.
~Cathy Rodriguez

I left this place cleaner than I entered it!!! *Cough cough*
~Linda Walton

Report minor maintenance to an owner "Can we please arrange a quote for that?"
~Elyssa Hart

What time are you coming to do your inspection?
~Sonia Kowalski

Tenant: Can you come around after lunch on Sunday (to do a routine)?
~Kim Chilvers

You're increasing my rent? Well here's a list of maintenance I've been collecting and I want it fixed ASAP.
~Emily Poulos

Renter; It's not my house, why would I fix it?
~Shelley Belle

You property managers never seem to stick around very long.
~Che Mcfarland

It’s not my pet. I’m just minding it so I thought that would be ok.
~Sarah Davis

“Can you stop all the traffic?” Rented a house on a major intersection.
~Ruth George

"Can I use my bond to cover the last four weeks of my rent?"
~Jenny Camilleri

My aunty died so I had to use the rent money for the funeral.
~Joanne Curtis

"Once I've bought groceries and paid my rego then what's left will go towards rent"!
~Gail Spendiff

I wish I had a private tenancy agreement instead of going with a property manager.
~Leon Faigan

"I paid it last night."
"I'm just minding it for a friend."
~Maggie Noske

"When I was making a rent payment, I didn't check which account I was paying into so I paid my rent money to my car loan so rent will be a bit late"
~Kelly Bartel

I have asked for repairs to be done for years, show them routine tenant was home and said no to any repairs needed.
~Rebecca Moss

Big hole in wall, that's wear and tear.
~Sharon Legutko

I'll be in this afternoon to pay rent.
~Wendy Caldwell

What do you mean I’m a week behind? I’m two weeks in advance!
~Corina Thomsen

I'm not paying for an electrician, I'll fix it myself!
~Kasey Hudson

Too wet to mow the lawns.
~Lynda Carter

I've got gastro can I move my inspection.
~Matilda Scott

I'm going to pay it all next week.
~Deborah Daken

Is the rent negotiable?
~Aimee Werne

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